itssexualhour:

my bf knows how to sail and stuff so we were going to fuck on a boat so when we sailed out to somewhere isolated we started making out pretty intensely and i kissed his neck and earlobe and whispered “aye aye captain” and he said “i can’t hear you” so i said it again and then he fucking went “oooooooooooooh” and started singing the fucking spongebob theme song i wanted to kill him

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